A woman I call Madonna

I got back yesterday from my long trip and it is great to be back. Although I miss my family, it's good to get back into the routine of things, especially the YMCA; I need it after eating so many goodies and pastries.

I boarded the last leg of my flight in Amsterdam. Coming down the aisle of the plane, I saw an older woman standing on her seat to reach the overhead compartments. She was right across the aisle from my seat. She was wearing a blue checkered dress that barely covered her southern parts, a white sweat jacket, white lacy stretch pants and purple shiny wedge heeled sandals. Her highlighted dark hair was pulled into a ponytail exposing very large hanging earrings. It was like Madonna from the 80's minus the hair.

I always pick an aisle seat on airplanes. Why? Because I want to be able to come and go as I please, and I don't mind getting up for others. As I got comfortable in my seat, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned my head and saw Madonna's heavily eye-lined eyes looking at me.

"Excuse me. Do you like the fan blowing on you like that?" she asked me as I was enjoying a bit of cool air. I don't remember my actual response but she requested I point my fan more towards me because it was blowing on her and she didn't like it. As I got up I thought

"Oh great. My whole trip is ruined!" Because it is all about me, isn't it?!

Before the plane even started taxiing, Madonna was up and out of her seat looking for the bathroom and then the stewardesses. When she came back, she had a glass of water with her. Then she proceeded to pull out a large box of pills carefully reaching in with her meticulously French manicured nails.

"Oh boy! I hope the pills are legal," I thought. Immediately with my mind's eye I saw some horrible impending disaster happening right across the aisle. My brain was working overtime incriminating this poor woman. I've never in my life seen so many pills of different sizes and colors at one time! There's got to be something fishy about this woman, all is not right.

As the plane took off, Madonna didn't look too well. "I bethca she's going to throw up and I'm right across the aisle from her. Fantastic!" Any moment now something was going to be happening across the aisle....

Soon after the plane took off, Madonna fell asleep. She slept half of the way and most of it hunched over. In my mind it looked very suspicious; how can anyone sleep like that?! The stewardess had to try to wake her up at one point as the couple seated in the middle and window seats wanted a rest room break. Madonna didn't really wake up, just straightened in her seat and then flopped back over when the couple came back. I don't know how anyone can sleep hunched over but she did.

When she finally awoke, she requested 3 extra boxes of desserts and a cup of hot water because she had brought her own tea bags. Seriously?! Who brings their own bags to a flight????!!!! She's got to be a little... eccentric!

Madonna glanced at me every once in a while but I pretended I didn't see her. I did NOT want to talk to her, I'd rather watch a million movies and keep to myself. As we neared Houston, I decided to grace her with my friendliness. She had been trying to operate her TV screen ever since she awoke and although I saw her dilemma, I didn't help her. Finally my conscience got the better of me and I tapped her on the shoulder. She was ever so grateful as she said "Thank you sweetheart." She was truly appreciative. And how sweet, she called me a sweetheart! We talked some more and I have to say I got what I deserved; she would've been a wonderful traveling companion because she was a very sweet, polite and graceful lady.

I'm writing this because I often prejudge people. I know I would've enjoyed Madonna's company had I just been able to get over my irritation from when we first met. Let that be a lesson to me to be more like my mother: sweet, accepting and helpful. And by the way, the pills she took were for travel sickness!